


Sammy.

by guiltyandcheap



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Codependency, Codependent Winchesters (Supernatural), Hurt Sam Winchester, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Quote: Sam and Dean Winchester are psychotically irrationally erotically codependent on each other, Sam Winchester Has PTSD, Worried Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:28:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25927393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/guiltyandcheap/pseuds/guiltyandcheap
Summary: Ever since Sam was little, Dean has called him,”Sammy.” It’s been a nickname reserved only for Dean’s use. It’s his privilege as a big brother.To Sam, the name means that he’s safe, protected, taken care of. He pretends he hates it, he insists that his name is,”Sam,” but the way his face softens and his body relaxes is undeniable. It’s the one word that always makes him feel safe.But hell changed a lot of things..
Relationships: Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 51





	Sammy.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, guys! TW for PTSD themes - please stay safe and don’t read if this may hurt you.
> 
> I couldn’t find out how to add in gifs so I hope this still makes sense without them.   
> This can be read as wincest or not, its your decision! I really appreciate feedback!

* * *

“ ** _Sammy_**.”

  
It had always been a term of endearment.  


When Dean held his newborn baby brother he said _,”Sammy,”_ but what he meant was, _I’m never gonna let anything happen to you._

When Sam fell and scraped his knee when he was 7, _”Sammy,”_ meant _stay still so I can put this bandage on you._

Every time Sam got hurt,” _Sammy,”_ meant _it’s okay, I’ve got you._

Hearing Dean’s voice rasp out _,”Sammy,”_ was the closest Sam ever got to home. It was the closest Sam ever got to normal. It was the closest Sam would ever get to safety.   
  
All Dean ever had to do was say the word and Sam’s head calmed. It was the one thing that had always worked.

Always _used to_ work. Until Sam broke it.  
  
•

The motel room isn’t quiet. But it doesn’t need to be for Dean to be shaking over the pauses in Sam’s breathing.   


Dean lies there awake, staring at the water-stained ceiling as Jeopardy plays on the tv. The hum of the radiator drowns out the street noise and plays a steady rhythm of _just a little too loud._

But the loudest sound is Sam’s careful, strained breaths. Dean knows what that means, he always does. Sam is the easiest thing Dean’s ever had to read.

With every pained inhale, Sam is telling Dean of the hell raging inside of his head. It’s cruel. All Dean can do is stare at the ceiling and fight his instinct that says,” _Sammy.”_

Dean wants to yank Sam from the war in his mind, but he can’t. This was supposed to be the one thing Dean knew how to do, but he doesn’t.

He’d never thought he was good for much, only raised to be a soldier. He could snuff out any monster, but how do you kill a nightmare? How do you slaughter a memory? Dean is useless without something to shoot or stab. He can’t do anything aside from-

“ _Sammy_.”

Dean’s voice is strained and the word sounds more like begging and pleading rather than reassurance.

Before, if Sam was having a nightmare, all Dean had to do was say it. Even sleeping, Sam’s mind and body would react to the word and he’d be soothed. God, Dean wishes everything was like before.

Sam never told Dean what Lucifer had done, but he really didn’t need to.   
  


“ _Sammy._ ”

Sam’s shoulders used to slouch in relief at that sound,

” _Sammy_?”

Now he just flinches.


End file.
